A Single Hour

My Uncle David saw an ending to his roughly 81 years on the planet last week. He was struck by a car and killed while crossing the street on his way home.  He had just left the evening prayer service at his Synagogue where he served daily for most of his life. The irony of that does not get by me.

I freely admit, I did not really know much of the details of my Uncle’s daily life. I had moved far away from home when I was just 23 and missed out on a lot with my family over the years. My uncle was just 20 years older than me, the youngest of his 2 other siblings, my mother being the middle child and my other Uncle Hyman being the eldest. With David’s passing, it leaves my mother as the only surviving family member of her nuclear family.

Neither David, nor the rest of our family saw this coming. I can only describe it as a sucker punch to our collective gut. A huge cement block that made up the foundation of our family, just got kicked out from underneath us, and now we’re all feeling a bit shaky and unstable. We could not have predicted this either.

This has really hit us hard.

Uncle David was an orthodox Jew. The rest of us are varying degrees of observant, with me being the least, and by least, I mean not at all.

I was the black sheep of our family. I gave up Judaism long ago and in my late 20’s began exploring my Spirituality through a trans-denominational Spiritual Center in Los Angeles called Agape, which means Unconditional Love. I attended services weekly and ultimately studied and became licensed as a Spiritual Practitioner. 

On the surface, Uncle David and I could not have been more different. I am a lesbian married to a woman who is not Jewish and every year we celebrate Christmas. In addition, I met Jesus in my 30’s, became a healer, and for 25 years now have conducted all my sessions with my clients with Jesus on hand. So, naturally when it came to my relationship with my Uncle, I kept my beliefs to myself. 

A day after he passed, the funeral was held at his synagogue. Most of my family had to participate by zoom as there was a blizzard that day, and it wasn’t safe to travel. My brother and sister-in-law were also out of town visiting my mother at the time. They were the ones who delivered the news to her. I can’t help but feel that was divinely ordained. My mother is turning 92 in a few weeks. I was glad she didn’t have to get that news over the phone or be alone afterwards. God’s mercy was obvious.

So my mother sat at her kitchen table huddled with my brother and wife watching the funeral for my Uncle on a 13” laptop.  I was 3000 miles away on the other coast watching at my desk, as the Rabbi began speaking about David who just 20 hours earlier had helped him facilitate the shabbat prayer service.  In orthodox Judaism, you don’t drive your car on the Sabbath, which is why David was walking home when he was hit by the car. 

The Rabbi began to speak and three words in, stopped. A moment later, he started again, and again he could not continue. He was overcome with grief. 

Another sucker punch. After several attempts, he was able to get through it. There were no assurances made. No Spiritual takes on the situation. Just a simple assessment of the man that David was to so many who knew him. 

The service lasted just an hour, one hour to sum up a man’s entire life. 

A handful of people spoke, one of his elder sons, 2 grandchildren, a couple colleagues at the synagogue; one who read the heartfelt letter that my brother had written that morning about my Uncle. They ended the service with Prayers recited in Hebrew. 

And in that single hour, I learned more about my Uncle than I ever knew about him in all my 60 years on the planet.  

My perception of who he was was a lovable oddball of sorts, different, old-school, devout, and somewhat un-relatable for me. For instance, Uncle David kept kosher and the rest of the family didn’t, so he often missed out on family events when food was involved like family cook-outs or Thanksgiving. That was hard, but over time we learned to accept it. His choice to be religious, sometimes kept him separate from the rest of us, and that didn't feel worth the price we paid for it in the big picture.

But after that single hour, I walked away with a much fuller picture of who he really was; a holy man who spent his entire life in service to others, with little to no thought for himself, who showed his love and concern readily and consistently to everyone he knew, and even to those he didn’t know. Uncle David was the definition of selfless. We knew him as the family historian who never forgot to remind  each of us when to light a yahrzeit candle for someone who had passed, who kept track of how each remote cousin was related, and called to congratulate each of us on happy occasions or check in when someone was ill. In my fragmented perception and my disappointment of not being closer to him, I neglected to appreciate the sacrifices he made daily for the sake of God. 

David’s body was transported to Israel later that night and buried the next morning. He was wrapped in a shroud and laid to rest in a simple shallow grave on a hill overlooking Jerusalem. Just the way he wanted it. It was somehow befitting for a simple man with a singular intention to love everyone he met, to pray unceasingly and to be of service to God. 

In a single hour, I learned everything that really mattered about my Uncle David. It’s hard to believe that your whole life can be synthesized down to an hour.  But in his case, it could have been one word; Holy.

When your hour comes, what do you want people to say about you? How will people say you spent your time on earth? What will they say was important to you? What will you want people to remember or to take away from having known you?

Uncle David’s sudden passing and my new fuller understanding and appreciation for his life, has caused me to reprioritize where my attention goes. Instead of worrying, instead of trying to fix things we judge as being broken or get things or earn things, or spending time wanting things, instead of spending precious time focused in the wrong ways, maybe the best use of all of our time is simply to show up with love in every situation and every relationship despite our human perceptions. 

In whatever time I have left, l am committed to being more like my Uncle David; keeping it simple and being simply about the business of love.

To The Truth That Sets Us All Free,

Donna Gershman

PS. If you need support in getting into alignment with your life purpose, releasing fear and resistance and living a life of meaning and Joy, please contact my office at (818)904-6840 or email me at youwillheal@aol.com for a free consultation. Life is short. Don't waste another minute feeling unfulfilled.

Livin' it UP with Donna Gershman & Katie Miller (Episode 3)

Donna and Katie cover a lot of ground in this high spirited discussion on how to live in the light and be able to maintain a high vibration no matter what, the case for not avoiding negative people or situations, the importance of expressing anger, and the two paths that are always out in front of you

 

Initiation Into Power

"The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any." - Alice Walker

Several years ago, I had a horrible nightmare. I've never forgotten it. After it was over, I realized that it was much more than a nightmare, it was a profound spiritual teaching.

In the dream, I saw myself standing in front of my spiritual teacher. In front of me, was a dark threatening force that carried a powerful evil energy that was moving rapidly toward me. All I could feel was sheer terror. I had never felt that kind of terror ever in my waking life. In that moment, I looked behind me to see the terror on my teacher’s face, as well. This is a man of great wisdom and knowledge, a man centered in love and peace. I was shocked to see he was having the same reaction as me. I knew I had no choice but to fight this force. I knew it was up to me.

Suddenly, I gathered all my fear, all my rage, all my anger, and with all my power, I put my hands out in front of me and yelled, “Noooooooooo” at the top of my lungs. This was not a "Nooo" from dread or from a pleading place in me. It was a definitive, declarative and absolute "NO". It was a " No" that was not up for debate. This is what I would describe as taking my power back. The dark force then began to dissipate in front of me and disappear into nothingness.

I looked back at my teacher, and he had a look of awe and respect on his face. Just then, the nightmare began all over again, exactly as it had the first time. It was like being in an instant replay except is was twice as fast. I saw the dark force, I looked behind me to see my teacher’s face in terror, I turned once again towards the force with my hands stretched out in front of me, but this time, I simply said, “No” without any fear, without any anger without any rage. I just said "no". The force once again dissipated in front of me and disappeared.

When I woke up, I felt different. I felt as if I had been initiated into another way of being, one that showed me how powerful I really am, and that nothing and no one had any power over me. I was certainly as powerful as my teacher, and I was more powerful than evil. I would never again have to fight against evil in my life, I could just refuse to give it any power over me. I could stand face-to-face with it, and know it was nothing pretending to be something,

I have understood on a deep level that nothing holds any power over us unless we inadvertently, through fear for example, give our power to it. I have practiced this principle for many years now with my clients who come to me with so-called “terminal” illness, having been told that their illness will decide their fate. My job is to remind them of their own power and that their illness holds no power over them. That is the key to healing. That is the key to freedom. That is the key to true empowerment.

Nothing and no one has any power over us. Our government, our leaders, our laws, nothing. Each of us holds a power equivalent to the entire universe and beyond. When we know that, we will no longer feel powerless to events or people. I believe we are here to remember the power that we hold, and to create fearlessly, knowing that nothing is truly against us, except us, and our own misguided beliefs.

We are more powerful than anything we fear. We are infinitely powerful. We must know that. If we want to access this power and demonstrate it, we can't be willy nilly about it. If you're in fear about something for instance, you've already managed to give some of your power away to it, by pretending it has more power than you.

Think about this for a moment. Everything is energy. When anything is reduced to it's most minute level, all that is left is energy, which never dies. It only changes form. So, if we all draw from the same energy source which is within us and all around us, how could someone have more power than you? They can't. All they can have is more belief in that than you. They might have more determination to use it, than you. But they can't actually have more access or more availability to it.

We can create the world we want to live in, by remembering how powerful we are, and by taking our power back from situations or people we have unconsciously given it away to through fear and false beliefs. There is no limit to what we can do with a mind and heart committed to good and a simple “No” to whatever fear or illusion of powerlessness that presents itself. Once you know how truly powerful you are, there will be no need to fight against anything. You will simply get clear about who you are, what you want, and remember who has the final say, you. 

At this time in humanity, I urge all of us not to give our power away to anything, including situations, a diagnosis or people in so-called "authority" or power positions. It is time to stand in assurance that all is possible with an unshakeable belief in your own ultimate power to create. You are the supreme authority in your life, Create whatever you can imagine, through the power of your belief and being undaunted by anything or anyone outside of you.

To The Truth That Sets Us All Free,

Donna Gershman ALSP  

PS. Are you ready to start living the life you deserve but know you must get out of your own way to have it? You don't have to do it alone. Feel free to email me at youwillheal@aol.com or contact my office at (818)904-6840 to set up a free consultation or 20 Minute Tune-UP! All sessions are conducted by telephone and or Skype.

Why Are You Here?

Have you ever really wondered why you're here on planet Earth?  What is your purpose for being here?  Was it just a random act that led you to be here right now at this time on the planet?  Other than the obvious explanation that your parents created you, why else are you here?  What are you here to do? What are you here to learn?  What are you here to bring?  These are some deep questions, right? And yet, without the answers, you could spend a lot of time spinning your wheels, and a lot of time unsatisfied.

It's important to know why you're here.  It's important to know what your gifts are. And most importantly, it's important that you're in alignment with your purpose, that you’re living your purpose. How do you know when you’re in alignment with your purpose, and how do you know when you're not?

It's simple. Are you fulfilled or aren’t you? Are you living a life that reflects all of the goodness that you are? Have you exceeded your wildest expectations of yourself? Are you a shining example of wholeness on planet Earth? Do you genuinely feel good about your life? Do you genuinely feel good about you? Are you fulfilled?

Or……

Are you going to a J-O-B every day, coming home, exhausted, just to pay the bills, and do it all over again tomorrow? Are you in a relationship that is painful, but have resigned yourself to being in it because the alternatives seem overwhelming? Does your body seem to be breaking down a little bit more and more all the time? Are you sick, in physical pain, emotional pain, unhappy, unsatisfied, and feel stuck? Have you given up on your dreams or worse yet, never attempted to pursue them? Do you feel blasé at best, or lack enthusiasm for your future? If so, then chances are you’ve strayed from your lesson plan a bit…and it may be time for an intervention.

In the end, the only thing that matters is how YOU feel about YOU. That’s it.

Did you accomplish what you were here to do? Did you become the person you were always meant to be? Did you love you?

When you are in alignment with your life's purpose, when you know who you are and what you're here to do, and when you take steps towards that vision, your life begins to fall into place, in a way that is most satisfying to you.  You start to live your dreams.

Unfortunately, until you are willing to move towards your vision, you will continue to spin your wheels, and feel unsatisfied with yourself and your life.  The key to being in alignment with your purpose is pure, unadulterated willingness. You have to really want it. You have to be willing to risk for it.  You have to be willing to do things differently.  You have to be willing to change. You can't fake willingness, when you do, it's simply “resistance” dressed up in disguise.

Today, search your soul.  What would you need to do differently to be in alignment with your deepest heart's desires? What would you need to let go of?  What would you need to embrace about yourself?  Even if you're not willing right now to make the changes, find the willingness to be willing. That's a good start, and really all you need, to take tiny steps forward towards being in alignment.  After all, that's what you're here to do, live your purpose and be fulfilled. The story ends well, that starts with willingness.

To The Truth That Sets Us All Free,

Donna Gershman, ALSP

PS. You can heal and you don’t have to do it alone! If you or someone you know needs support in healing an issue whether it be physical, emotional or spiritual, please feel free to email me at youwillheal@aol.com or contact my office at (818)904-6840 for a free telephone consultation. 

The Purpose of Illness

Many years ago, I worked with a woman who had cancer throughout her entire body and was preparing to die. She told me how she had been fighting the disease for years, had done every treatment, and now she was at the end. I listened to her story carefully and when she was done, I asked her one simple question. I asked if she could think of any small way that the cancer had changed her life in a good way. She looked at me in disbelief but then in earnestness, took several moments to think about it.

Finally, she responded, “Well, I’m on disability.” I marveled at her honesty, and proceeded to tell her that in actuality, she did not have a health issue at all, she had a prosperity issue.

We then prayed together, and in the prayer I never mentioned her body or the cancer at all. I simply prayed for her to know more prosperity in her life. She returned two weeks later to tell me that she was cancer free, and that her Doctors did not know why. But, she did.

She’s alive today, not because of me, but because she was willing to be radically honest with herself. The Truth will indeed set you free.

Illness always serves a purpose. Sometimes, it’s a wake up call; a sign that it’s time to pay attention to ourselves on another level, one we have most likely been avoiding.

Illness can serve us in many ways. It can be as simple as helping us to get out of work. Sometimes, we just need time off, but for whatever reason, we can’t seem to give ourselves permission to take it, so we get sick and then are forced to. This is much more socially acceptable in our minds than asking for a mental health day, or telling the boss that we’re tired and need to rest.

Other times, like with my client, illness can be meeting a deep unconscious need. When you really think about it, being sick gets us off the hook from a lot of things, like responsibility, expectations, or having to step into our greatness. It also gets us things like attention, love, compassion, understanding, forgiveness, patience, support, money, companionship, and caretaking, to name a few.

There are actually a zillion ways an illness can serve us, but no one ever wants to admit it, because it seems wrong to want these things, in the first place. The truth is, we have every right to want these things and to have them. But, we justify why we can’t just ask for what we want, “I can’t take time off right now, I’m too busy at work. I’ll look selfish, or like I’m not a team player.”

In the case of my client, she was more afraid of being homeless than of being sick. She was tired of taking care of herself and struggling. Disability paid for her to live without having to work anymore. I know it seems radical, but these are deep unconscious needs we are talking about. No one would make the decision consciously to get sick with cancer just to get out of having to work. It’s what our sub-conscious does, to meet an unmet need.

If you are willing to be honest enough with yourself and identify what need in you is being met by the illness, then you will have the opportunity to meet that need in another way. If you can say for instance, “I feel very alone and need my family around me”. Then you can ask for that and know you deserve to have it, without creating an illness to meet that need.

Obviously, to prevent illness, we must be awake to our needs, be willing to give ourselves what we need, when we need it, and know that we are deserving of that.

Illness is not a random act. It holds a purpose. Find that purpose, meet it head on, and you will be on your way to health once again.

To the Truth That Sets Us All Free,

Donna Gershman ALSP

PS. Don't Suffer: If you or someone you know needs support in healing a disease, illness, chronic condition or pain, please feel free to email me at youwillheal@aol.com or contact me directly at (818)904-6840.